The Prodigal Son Returns
Oh how I have missed this! Whilst our loyal readers have been sitting on their see-saws, watching time drip by, the Decablogs re-boot has been hard at work. Admittedly, our first time round the block was not exactly successful, but “The Boys Are Back In Town”.
Our ‘ten guys with too much spare time’ has in fact become two, and our ‘spare time’ has since been absorbed by the daily grind of academia. Turtles have adorned our necks, and the hearth is surrounded by abandoned pipes and Penguin Classics (lord forbid we use Wordsworth classics). This whole time, however, we have had a resurgence plan.
1. Get Lives
We realised that we were wasting away our days sitting on see-saws trying to think of funny tidbits that we thought were ‘profound’ yet ‘funny’. Blogs don’t run on the stupid witticisms of self-important teenagers… no, they run on the stupid jokes of university students. And thus, henceforth, my corner of Decablogs will document whatever tickles my fancy on a weekly basis – thus proclaimed Laird Sacks.
2. Find a Niche
The one thing that every blogging professional promotes is the idea of finding a niche. I should know, I spent all of Decablogs’ measly income on consultations with these scam artists. That and Decablogs branded desk mats (P.S. they haven’t sold out yet). And so, we set out on a long journey in August to find a niche. Fortunately for the world, that journey took a long long long time and a lot of soul searching, which meant that whilst the people were struggling with the Cost of Living Crisis, at least we were doing something productive. Here we are now, nicheless.
Is this any different to the past? Absolutely not. But this time we have defined our niche as “nicheless humorous drivel”, so at least we have something to say for ourselves. Not that this will make us any money, let alone more of it.
3. Become Somewhat Less Snobby
This was an important one. All this flowery language, denounced by our laymen readers as ostentatious and cumbersome, was doing diddly squat. I certainly needed to take a real hard look at myself, and I did. Only issue: I have spent the last 5 months surrounded by idiot Americans, so dear readers, you now have to deal with the superiority complex I have developed.
So here we are, welcome new readers! The first instalment of my nicheless, snobby exposé about my life will be with you soon. Not that I recommend you deign to read it (talking to you fluffy Americans).